


Build Your Castle, Stop Collecting Stones

by jameee25



Category: Eyewitness (US TV)
Genre: Barebacking, Established Relationship, Fluff, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-24
Updated: 2017-12-24
Packaged: 2019-02-19 10:59:23
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,829
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13122339
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jameee25/pseuds/jameee25
Summary: A lot of things change in one year.Others stay just the same.Lukas comes home for the Holidays.





	Build Your Castle, Stop Collecting Stones

**Author's Note:**

  * For [andromedagalaxy](https://archiveofourown.org/users/andromedagalaxy/gifts).



> This is a Philkas Secret Santa Exchange fic. 
> 
> My darling. You asked for established relationship, them being open with each other, and some goofy, teasy banter. You wanted to see them deal with life post-series, and I hope I delivered.
> 
> You're an amazing writer, and a great friend, and it's been an honor to write this for you. Hope you like how it turned out.  
> Have a brilliant Christmas, and Happy Happy Happy New Year.
> 
> My eternal love and gratitude to non_tiembo_mala for betaing this into shape. All remaining mistakes are mine.
> 
> Title is from Patrick Wolf's 'To The Lighthouse'

In the end, things didn't really happen the way Lukas thought they would. 

But don't they always?

Their senior year in high school was hectic, and nightmarish, absolutely amazing and nothing like Lukas pictured it, if had anyone would’ve asked him to guess.

In the end, it was Philip who stayed behind in their too small town. He didn't go to college. Said he needed some time to wind down, to figure himself out, let everything wash itself out of his system before he could think about moving on. Lukas gets it. He does. But it doesn’t help with the guilt eating up at his insides for leaving Philip behind and going on the circuit. 

"But-" Lukas tried convincing him for what felt like the sixteenth time in the last month to send college applications. 

He feels selfish for leaving, and he finds it hard to understand how someone as talented as Philip can let such opportunity go to waste, can stay in that tiny, suffocating place without biting at the first chance to get the fuck out of there with bared canines. 

"Lukas, no. I need to do this for me. I need to figure out what I want to do, who I am. And I'm glad that you're not- that you know where you're heading, and that you have your tournaments and your sponsors and your circuit. I'm just. I'm not there yet." 

"And what about me, huh?" Lukas aims for cocky, but can't help the sliver of self-consciousness, of doubt, of fear that still colors his tone. 

"Where do I fit in that big ol' plan of yours?"

Philip smiles. Puts a hand on his chest, left side. Gives a little boob squeeze a-la Chris Evans.

"Right here. You belong right here, " he says and leans in for a kiss. Lukas obliges, like the love sick sad sap he's become. Rose's words, not his.

"You're the easiest thing in my life babe. My only constant."

Lukas snorted. "You almost failed math, don't give me this crap." 

"Yeah well, I didn't fail. So can it." Philip makes a mock offended face, as if he's about to pull back, but Lukas is faster, and he grabs at Philip's ass, gives it a playful slap.

"What about here? Do I still fit here?" he asks, voice going down a notch, palming Philip's glorious backside.

"You're a fucking dick, " Philip sighs into his mouth, but he makes no effort to move back, and Lukas was never one to miss opportunities.

"Hmmmm, " he murmurs, and seals their lips together.

End of conversation. 

:::

You’d think seven hours on a plane, especially in Lukas's current mental state, would feel like forever. Surprisingly, it doesn’t. 

Lukas can’t sleep, nibbles on the always-too-cold airplane bun and some sad looking vegetables, but his stomach is in knots. And time moves fast.

He is fidgety; tired as fuck, and he still has no idea what exactly is he going to do when this fucking metal box finally lands. He focuses on detached, minor details, because the actual thought of seeing Philip makes his heart race and his palms sweaty. 

Four months. It's the longest they've been apart, and even though they texted every day, talked at least three times a week and tried the occasional Skype sex, Lukas is willing to admit he's scared. 

What if Philip doesn't want him anymore? What if, soon as the excitement and the longing that comes with the long distance wears off, Philip will finally realize how he could do so much better than Lukas? 

There's bile rising in Lukas's throat, and he closes his eyes and takes a deep breath, wills his mind to shut the fuck up and gets back to planning. Minor details. Right.

Will hugging him be too much? A hug seems cool enough. But where will he put his hands? Sure, he's gotten better with the whole PDA thing, especially in a place like JFK, when they're among a gazillion other people, but it's been a while. And he can hardly remember what his hands on Philip even feel like. He shoves the thought aside, another one on the long list of ‘not now’, and takes out his headphones before the last album of The National resumes playing. Philip's music. Fuck, he only hopes he doesn’t cry.

:::

JFK is packed, as usual, and the damn baggage claim carousel moves extra slow today, Lukas is sure of it. His palms are sweaty as he picks up his luggage and drops it onto his cart. His heart beats so fast he thinks he’s gonna faint. He hurries down to the arrivals exit, but his feet feel like someone poured liquid lead all over them. His mind is hazy, and he searches frantically through the crowd, vision blocked by some hysterical teen, clinging like an octopus to a bald man who looks entirely too old to be her daddy. He walks past them, trying not to knock his cart into anyone just as he sees him. 

Philip is there. Just Philip. He can't help but wonder how he managed to coax Bo into staying home, not that he's complaining. Philip is gorgeous, wearing ridiculous dad jeans and a Henley, wrapped up in a pea coat that shouldn't look so good with that ugly ass olive green. He's got a scarf around his neck, and Lukas finally remembers that it's New York, and in the dead of winter. He remembers ice cold feet latched onto his calves and _You asshole!_ and the answering, most beautiful laugh in the world. And what comes after. His boyfriend just stands there, looking every bit the uptight city boy Lukas thought he was when he first laid eyes on him. His breath catches in his lungs now just the same.

Philip doesn’t see him, not with the detour he took to pass the live action babysitter porn on the way out, and Lukas takes a second to appreciate him from afar. He’s lost weight, his hair is longer, and he scrolls nervously down his phone, biting his lower lip, glancing around the arrivals entrance every two seconds. He is the most perfect thing Lukas has ever seen.

The second their eyes meet and it’s a done deal. Philip looks up, mouth gaping open in a silent gasp, the hand that’s holding his phone falling to the side. 

Fuck it all. 

Lukas runs to him.

:::

As soon as he sees the car Lukas starts laughing. It may not be the most sensitive thing in the world to do, but it seems to ease some of the tension in his gut, the feeling that's settled there since they let go of their crash-collide version of a hug back in the terminal. Besides, he can't not laugh and he never claimed to be the most social-norm savvy person in the world.

"The sheriff's car? Really? That's your idea of a hot ride to pick your boyfriend in after months of separation babe?" 

"Shut the fuck up Lukas, Jesus," Philip huffs out, but Lukas can tell he's not really offended. 

"No babe, I mean it- What, you were in such a hurry to get to me, this was your way of dodging a speeding ticket?" Lukas laughs again, but pulls Philip into a hug and kisses his temple before releasing him and getting into the passenger seat.

"Fuck you, Lukas. Gabe's car has a manual shift. Getting this license was a pain in the ass as is, I don't need to suffer even more if I can help it. " 

Lukas snores, grabs Philip's hand, and brings it up to his mouth for a kiss.

"So, officer Shea, now that you got me what are you planning to do with me?" 

"I'm going to skip my surprise and take us both back home, is what I'm going to do," Philip rolls his eyes in exasperation, buckles up, and put the key into the ignition. "Jesus, I forgot how annoying you are."

Lukas's ears perk up. 

"Surprise? What surprise? We're not going home?" He tries giving Philip his best puppy eyes, even though he knows they got nothing on Philip's and he probably looks like an idiot instead.

"Well, I figured your dad would want to spend some time with you, and everyone is back home for winter break, so I wanted to have you just for myself for a little while," Philip shrugs.

"Philip Shea! You got as a place with an hourly rate? Whatever will the good people of Tivoli think?" Lukas says in mock horror. He is giddy with happiness and excitement and his dick stirs in his pants. He did not see this one coming. 

"Shut up, oh my god!" Philip pulls out of the parking spot, carefully navigates them into the crowded exit. 

"And I didn’t. Asshole. I don't really want our first time after almost four months to be on some cheap sheets smelling of other people's sex, Jesus."

Lukas hums. 

"I seem to recall a time when it didn't matter," he wiggles his eyebrows, but can't help feeling relieved. 

"Yeah well, hopefully no one is going to die soon so I can allow myself some higher standards." 

Lukas laughs at that, and threads his fingers with Philip's over the center console.

The drive passes in a haze. Lukas can’t believe it’s real. He can’t believe he’s fucking finally here, and soon enough he’ll be touching Philip again, tasting him again. Not that they’d stopped touching since they fucking collided into each other at the airport, but that’s not the kind of touching Lukas has in mind.

At one point he glances down and sees the siren switch on the dashboard, and the hysterics start again. He really can't help it. Lukas feels better than he has in the past weeks, podium spot in Arizona included, and he doesn't really care if his behavior will earn him some glares and huffs from his boyfriend. He's happy.

"I don't know why I missed your idiot face, I swear to god."

Lukas pouts and turns in his sit so he's half facing Philip.

 

"Lie. You love my face," He waggles his eyebrows at that, makes a kissy motion with his lips.

"No, I don't. Not at all. Not even one bit."

"I'll remind you that later, when you're sitting on said face." Boom.

 

"Jesus fuck, Lukas! " Philip yelps as he steers back the car to the middle of the lane, after taking a sharp left, startled by Lukas's forwardness.

"You can't just say that! I nearly drove us off the road!"

"Yeah well, it’s god's honest truth," Lukas kisses Philip's hand again, but settles down in his seat, content smile on his face, not wanting to risk it any further.

"So. You didn't tell me where exactly are you taking me."

:::

They're in the cabin. Lukas should have seen that one coming. 

As opposed to what everyone might think, being there doesn't automatically sent them into a panic attack. Yeah, the first few times weren't exactly fun, or easy, but his therapist insisted - 'You've got to face your fears Lukas' - and Philip insisted - 'I refuse to let it be another trigger for us, Lukas' - and with time, and sheer determination, they were able to get comfortable there again. 

And by comfortable Lukas meant 'a place to have sex when all the parents are at home' because the barn was freezing and no one likes hay burns.

Philip's hands are on him as soon as he gets the cabin door open, and both of them still have enough brain power to not be cliché and grind on the door. They make it to the wall just next to it instead. 

Lukas is gasping for air, sucking on Philip's tongue like his life’s depending on it (it is), clutching at the back of his shirt, palming his ass to bring him closer, closer, but it’s still not close enough.

"Jesus, you're here, you're here, you're really here-" Philip mumbles against his mouth, and Lukas is torn between taking him then and there or making it last forever. He settles on biting into Philip's plump lower lip, tugging it with his teeth, and taking a deep breath. 

There are so many things Lukas wants to do, so many things he wants to say, needs to say. But all of it can wait until later. There'll be time for reassurance, and cuddles, and swapping war stories. Right now he needs to be as close to Philip as possible, smelling him, tasting him, having him in any which way he can.

"Goddamn baby, I fucking missed you," he moans into Philip's neck, inhaling him, letting his hands roam all over Philip's back, and neck, and ass. 

Philip lets out a choked sob, and nothing gets to Lukas him more than seeing his love like this, fragile, and open, and pliant in his arms, sarcastic amour cast aside, and all that’s left is pure, perfect Philip. The tears is his eyes won't do though.

“Hey, no, no. No crying baby, shhhh, I'm here now,” he says softly, and Philip sniffles, looking up at him. 

“Yeah, no, I’m sorry. Just-overwhelmed, I guess,” Philip smiles, reaching out to cup Lukas's face. “Knocked out by how fucking gorgeous you are.”

"Shut up, " Lukas blushes, still not used to having Philip looking at him like that, even after all this time.

Philip does shut up at that, grabbing Lukas by the shirt and pulling him in the direction of the bed. 

“Jesus, fuck,” he manages as they part for air. Lukas is doing a hasty job of unbuttoning Philip's coat, nimble fingers working their way under Philip's Henley, trying to touch as much skin as possible without disconnecting their mouths. 

Philip lets out a needy sob as he falls ass first onto the bed, Lukas's weight suddenly on him.

"Wait a second, wait a second, wait, babe, uh,-” 

Lukas is reluctant to oblige, but he knows Philip is right. He's gonna blow his load in a second if they don't slow things down.

They kiss again, slow and wet, and Philip palms Lukas through the worn out material of his jeans. He is hard as diamonds. Philip just smiles.

Philip's mouth is wet and open against him.

"Lukas," he moans into the next kiss, and Lukas pushes him gently onto his back, settling his weight between Philip's open thighs.

Lukas feels like he can't breathe. He doesn't want to, and when Philip lets his tongue slide over the roof of his mouth, he groans and grinds against him desperately. He rolls his hips forward and Philip grabs his ass, pulling him closer. This is it. This is fucking it. It's like scraping a blade against the itch that can never be scratched enough, and Lukas gags for it.

Lukas’s head gets heavier, his mind borderline delusional from the lack of air or perhaps for having every single fantasy he’s had in the past three months come to life, and Philip gasps under him, letting out those kitten sounds that go straight into Lukas's dick, making him impossibly harder. Relief washes over Lukas like a tidal wave. They're here. And they're together, and it seems as if their hunger for each other grew even more. 

No place like motherfucking home, alright.

Lukas bites down Philip's throat, leaving a mark that will undoubtedly earn him some glares from his dad in the best case scenario, from Helen in the worst. He doesn't give a fuck, not right now.

Philip is so obedient and soft under him, stretching his neck to give Lukas better access, and when Lukas's tongue drags at the spot behind his ear, he moans softly and turns his head to catch Lukas's in another bruising kiss.

"Lukas-" Philip sounds absolutely wrecked, and Lukas pulls off long enough to look into his eyes, seeking confirmation, consent, wanting to make sure they're both on the same page.

"Please baby, c'mon, c'mon, need you," Philip mumbles, grabbing at Lukas's neck once again, his gaze lowered, almost ashamed. And Lukas can't have that.

"Anything sweetheart, anything you want," he breathes into Philip's lips, fingers already working at the hem of his shirt.

"Off, off, get this thing off." 

Philip laughs at that, breathy and short, and squirms under Lukas to rid himself of the offensive garment. He lowers his hand to the button of his jeans, and Lukas stops his frenzied pulling at his own tee to stare down the remarkable sight that is Philip Shea shirtless.

"Fuck, baby," he whispered, reaching out with one pale, calloused hand to caress Philip's chest. 

Oh, but his boyfriend is something else. 

Lukas kicks off his own pants hastily, planting rough kisses down Philip's throat as his hands tug at Philip's jeans and briefs. He pulls back long enough to jerk them off Philip's legs, and then he slides back up, covering Philip's body with his. 

"There's lube in the table," Philip manages, sounding as breathless and startled as Lukas feels from the first jolt of their cocks brushing together. 

Lukas sits up, knees in between Philip's thighs. He reaches over and grabs the bottle, lowers his head to mouth at the hollow of Philip's throat. He wants to get lower, put his mouth on Philip's gently defined abs, his cock, fuck, his pink hole, but Philip grabs him practically by the ears, pulling him up, ignoring Lukas's whine. 

"After, after, baby, just want you in me right now," Philip says against his neck.

Lukas growls, and bites at Philip's collarbone while opening the slim bottle and squirting some slick on his fingers. 

"Yeah, yes, need you, God, Philip-" Lukas lets one shaky, impatient finger slide against Philip's rim, barely touching him, but then Philip arches his back beneath him, and Lukas corkscrews two inside, blinded with the need to get into that tight, moist, hot place.

Philip makes a sound like a wounded animal, and grips Lukas's biceps, hard.

"Fuck, yes, that's it, gimme," he breaths, and Lukas scissors his fingers and curls them up to tease at his prostate, rocking his hips to add to the sensation. 

"Philip, Philip, my Philip, goddamn, I missed you so much-" Lukas knows that he's mumbling now, panting against Philip's neck as he fingers him open, stretching him on his knuckles before adding a third digit. Philip hisses, but his dick leaks against Lukas's abdomen, and Lukas just breathes into his mouth, nuzzling apologetically at his nose.

"Oh," Philip says, drawing in a harsh breath, spreading his legs wider. He groans, and rolls his hips back, tightening his ass around Lukas fingers. 

"Inside me Lukas, please-" Philip bites the curve of Lukas's ear, and weaves his fingers in Lukas's hair. And Lukas can only wait so much.

Lukas grabs Philip's hips to hold him still. “Shhh…” 

With one soft grunt, the blunt head of his dick is sliding inside Philip. He lets out a breath he doesn’t know he was holding, and gives himself a minute to adjust to the hot-tight sensation around him. 

“More,” Philip pants, and Lukas's teeth sink into his shoulder, and he wills himself not to come on the spot. 

He can't look away as he lifts one of Philip's hands, leaning back as his gaze falls down to watch his cock slide into Philip slowly. He Lets himself bask in the moment, concentrating only on the gorgeous specimen under him, working him like a fiddle, knowing how to take him apart and stitch him back together again.

Lukas is all the way in, sheathing himself before slightly pulling out, repeating the motion over and over. 

"More," Philip pants under him, and Lukas's movements became faster, more shallow thrusts that he aims to get deeper inside Philip. He brings Philip's legs around his waist again. 

 

"You are so fucking beautiful, " Lukas says, and he moves, rocking into Philip. 

Time has no meaning at this point. How long he’s been inside Philip doesn’t matter, only that he is. And that it right. They felt right. 

They move together, Lukas's hips undulating against Philip's slowly. Philip's cock is pressed between their stomachs, rubbing slickly against heated skin. 

Philip cries out as Lukas thrusts into him over and over. Lukas looks down at him, watching him as he watches Lukas, their eyes locked on each other. The pleasure is so slow and intense it's almost unbearable. Lukas is getting close, and his breathing starts to catch in his throat. It's about to be over, and he doesn't want that. 

He takes one look at Philip's eyes and immediately closes his. Fuck. It’s ravishing, Philip's look. Wild and lost and predatory. But there is so much love there, and adoration, and fucking pure awe that Lukas has to look away to catch his breath. He feels like he is going to cry. His mind is gone, lost to an endless chant of silent begging as he struggles to inhale sweat and sex-tinted air to keep from going mad.

“My baby, “Lukas's voice is so low it sounds like he’s whispering, and Philip keens in return and pulls him for a kiss. 

"Uhhh-" Philip groans. It's desperate, and needy, and Lukas wants it to be the soundtrack of his life. 

“ Shhhh, a little longer, little longer, I’m with you,” Lukas replies, and shoves harder against Philip, angling his hips to hit his sweet spot with every thrust. Philip arches into him, closing his eyes for a moment. Lukas's arms are shaking.

Philip whimpers, and Lukas thrusts faster, his hands lifting Philip's hips, Philip's legs falling from his back until Lukas’ stomach is rubbing him just so. Lukas feel the wet drag of Philip's cock against his tightening muscles and curses.

"Oh, fuck," Philip chokes out. His arms give way and he falls onto the bed, rolling his hips against Lukas's hard, making balls slap against Lukas's ass.

"Fuck. Fuck baby, I can't, I gotta-" he lets out a choked moan, determined to let Philip come before him, but the tight hot pressure is too much, and he really can't hold on any longer.

"Do it, do it, want you to- " Philip pants from underneath him, letting go of Lukas bicep to strip at his leaking cock. 

"Come in me, c'mon Lukas, want you to, fuck-" he lets out a shuddering breath and presses his thumb to the slit of his dick. Lukas's mouth waters. He's not quite sure when he comes inside Philip, painting his insides and shouting, heart beating like a jackhammer against his ribcage.

He's still shaking with the aftershocks when he feels Philip tighten up around him, spilling hot against their stomachs. 

They're staring at each other, unable to do anything else as their bodies stay connected, breath coming in sharp, short gasps.

"Hey," Lukas says, drawing the vowels, rubbing his nose against Philip's jaw.

"Merry Christmas. I love you." Philip just laughs, threading his fingers through Lukas's hair. 

 

"Welcome home, baby."


End file.
